Love Is In The Air So If You Leave Me Can I Come Too
I was on a forum earlier, and the thread that I stumbled on was ‘Why bother getting married?’
There were a few answers tossed back and forward, and it really caused me to think!
I remember the time that I met ‘She Who Must Be Obeyed’, and the impact that she had on me at the time! (I must have had one on her too, because she’s still here!).
She’s a bit younger than me, and was a ‘bopper’ when John Paul Young, or JPY, was at his peak.
Young had a number of hits, probably the best remembered being ‘Love Is In The Air’, which was revived in 1992 for the movie “Strictly Ballroom“. (“Love Is In The Air” was first released in 1978).
When my wife and I met, I wasn’t really looking to get romantically involved, and I have to admit that I was looking elsewhere at the time…
We became friends though, and it was that friendship that eventually led to a deeper relationship.
Often times, when people think that “Love Is In The Air’, it’s romance that’s hanging around, which is to me, a sort of fantasy.
While I am a romantic (not much of a ballroom dancer, but an expert in the old ‘Town Hall Crawl’ as practiced by generations of Aussie blokes before me!), I believe that building a relationship involves commitment, and going forward with our eyes wide open.
We spent hours talking about our dreams of the future, and a whole range of related stuff.
We were always very agreeable, and in fact had never had an argument until the night before the wedding.
Where better to have a full on ‘blue’ than in front of the pastor who was going to marry us the next day?
He just sat there, grinning like a cheshire cat, saying that he’d been waiting for it, and that it had to be a good one because it was our first.
And it was a doozy, though not enough to cause things to fall through, because we had been building a good foundation.
Apart from our friendship, the other key in our relationship has been a good sense of humor!
Our punchline has always been ‘If you leave me, can I come too’. Which to us, basically means we’re here, together, and that’s it.
It’s a covenant that we made, and have had the grace to be able to keep.
At the risk of being like one of those old musicals where people break into song at the first, and every, chance they get, I’ve included the song that inspired that punchline!
Aussie group “Mental as Anything” released ‘If you leave me, can I come too’ in 1981.
The original ‘Mentals’ were made up of:
- Martin Plaza: (Martin Murphy) vocals, guitar.
- Reg Mombassa: (Chris O’Doherty) lead guitar, vocals.
- Andrew “Greedy” Smith: vocals, keyboards, harmonica.
- Peter O’Doherty: bass, vocals.
- Wayne “Bird” De Lisle: (David Twohill) drums.
The group last toured, with a changed line up, in 2007.
Your story with your wife is very similar to mine. Sadly though we let things get between our friendship during the marriage and the marriage ended up falling apart without that base.
I hope you two do not end up where we did!
I’m sorry to hear that. It’s never easy, and hearing things like that makes grateful for what I have! Thanks for dropping by,Allan
Hi Allan,
Another great post. I always enjoy dropping by a couple times a week to check out your ruminations. 🙂
Unfortunately, quite a few married couples have problems in adhering to the “for better or worse” phrase and walk away from a marriage at the least sign of strain. Being of an older generation I’m beginning to feel like a museum piece since my wife and I have been friends for almost fifty years and will have been married for 44 years in October. We’ve gone through quite a few “better or worse” cycles and managed to survive. All it takes is patience and perseverance and a kiss before bedtime no matter how po’ed you are.
You have brought back some memories with these songs Allan. I did see JPY (John Paul Young) live a few times back when these songs were hits! My school friends and I used to go out to concerts and pop shows filmed live before a studio audience and they were always a lot of fun!
It’s really wonderful to hear of your relationship with your wife being built on such a strong foundation and from that, you are sure to be together for a very long time. Congratulations on having come this far 🙂
G’day Don,
Thanks for dropping by, always great to hear from you!
I wonder sometimes if we come to expect everything to be easy, and when it doesn’t work out that way, we walk?
I wonder if this bloke has the right idea? The Man
Cheers!
Hi Ange,
It’s not easy sometimes, but then if something is worth having, putting the effort in can only add value.
We had a laugh over dinner tonight remembering what the argument was about before the wedding. Obviously not a major issue, tho’ at the time it knocked us for six!
The songs bring back memories for me too – reminders of a misspent youth?
Cheers!
Hi Allan,
Here’s a link to an article in the Ottawa Citizen (May 5, 2008) that you might find worthy of a blog post on relationships.
http://tinyurl.com/5oh4ty
I don’t think it would fit into the “Grateful We’re Not Dead” blog but there just may be a new song in there. 🙂
Don
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